Something that I've been thinking about all day ...

Wow, two in one day.

I'm a WILD WOMAN, I tell you.

But I have a purpose. Lately I've been hearing a lot of people talk about loving yourself, knowing yourself, etc etc. I also read something to the effect that the most important thing is how you feel about yourself, or something like that.

Okay, here's the thing: the more I think about it, the more I disagree. Like, a lot.

Yes, you need to love yourself. Yes, you need to find out who you are and be who you are. Yes, you need to be happy with yourself and not just focus on pleasing others. This philosophy, though, is unbelievably self-centered. Say it with me: DUH. Now that we've got that out of the way, I'll explain what I mean and why I disagree.

It is important to be happy with yourself and to do what makes you happy, but not to the exclusion of anything and everyone else. If you were going to go off and live in a cave somewhere, that M.O. would be fine and work out great for you. The thing is that we have to live with other people. Even if you technically live alone, you have interaction with other people all day. Fellow students, teachers, coworkers, the lady in the supermarket checkout line, whatever.

Not only do you have to live with other people, you have to live peacefully. You have to be kind, you have to get along to the best of your abilities. This isn't something that you can just do; having had three different roommates with very different personalities over the last three years, trust me, I KNOW. You can just get along with some people easier than others, true, but living with someone is another thing entirely. If you are so focused on only pleasing yourself, you're going to have trouble. Sometimes you have to do things you'd rather not for the sake of someone else.

Something else to think about: your every action affects the people around you. If you're focused on only pleasing yourself and to hell with everybody else, chances are that you're really hurting someone, and you don't even know it. If you focus on only pleasing yourself, you won't even see anyone around you. That's when you can do some real damage, and the sad part is that you'll have no idea. That person may start acting differently towards you and you'll have no clue why; then you won't do anything about it and will keep on hurting them.

Yet another point: humans are inherently selfish, but we're supposed to fight that. Now I realize I'm speaking from the perspective of a Christian, and not everyone would agree with me. That's fine, because everyone has the right to an opinion. As Christians, we are called to be servants. We are called to give of ourselves to help others - and not just sometimes, but all day, every day. What is a servant supposed to be focused on? Certainly not themselves. Think about the days when slavery was an accepted practice. What would selfishness get a slave? Nothing, and in fact it would probably cost them their life.

I'm not sitting here saying I have this down and I always have a servant's heart, because I know I don't. Like I said, humans are inherently selfish. But we are called to serve with humility, not please ourselves. And I think that if you try only to please yourself, you won't. If you're hurting people and losing friends right and left in the name of pleasing yourself, you're not going to be happy.

Rather, find out God's will for your life and strive to do it. Be meek and humble; stand up for yourself and don't let people treat you badly, but think of others before yourself. If helping someone means denying yourself a little pleasure but doing some good in their life, do it anyway. When you are someone that can be counted on, someone who makes others happy, then you will be happy with yourself. Surrounded by all the love that's sure to come your way, how could you not be?

The problem is that we focus too much on ourselves. Try forgetting about your problems and listening to someone else for a change. And don't just sit there being quiet while they talk, really listen! It's hard to do, but we all can if we try. Show compassion and love people. Remember that there are many, many ways to love someone - it's so much more than just three little words. You love through your words and your actions, what you do and sometimes what you don't. Conversely, you can show a lack of love through these same things. Be conscious of how you treat people. You can tell me you love me all you want, but if your actions say otherwise then what do you think I'm going to listen to? What would you listen to? Where words whisper, actions scream. Again, I know I'm not always as good at this as I would wish, so I'm not trying to be hypocritical or tell you that I've got it all figured out, because I certainly don't. This is what I believe, though, and what I try to live out.

Anyway, that's my take on it, agree or disagree as you will. I'll welcome any thoughts anyone wants to share. :)

Introductions

Greetings, all and sundry!

While reading a friend's blog I realized how much I like to blog myself, so ... here I am! :)

I don't think anyone will be reading this who doesn't know me, but for the sake of argument how about some basic introduction.

I'm Leslie, I'm turning 21 in ~*4*~ days (!) and I live in the beautiful metropolis of Williamsburg, KY. Never heard of it? Get in line. I am in my junior year at the University of the Cumberlands in Williamsburg and, if I live long enough, will be getting my degree in English with a history minor, and possibly a religion minor as well. After college I'm going to grad school somewhere ... I don't know where yet, Brianna! ... where I will study archival studies or library science. I already dress like a librarian, so might as well become one, right?

I want to explain the title of my blog because now that I think about it, it might sound a little narcissistic ... brilliance, meaning that everything contained herein is brilliant? Yeah, not so much. The title comes from two conversations I've had with my best friends in the last couple of days, in which we decided that Leslie is at her most brilliant around midnight when she really ought to be going to sleep instead of running her mouth. Sometimes this is in the literal sense - I come up with things that amaze even myself. Other times, actually most times, the word "brilliance" is used with the strongest sense of sarcasm possible. The conversation in question centered around The Curls (aka Josh Groban) and The Sparkles (aka Edward Cullen).

Bri is concerned about my love for The Sparkles, since of course she's selfish and MUST KEEP HIM ALL TO HERSELF OM NOM, so I had to explain to her that I can love them both, and The Curls and The Sparkles can live in peace and harmony. The brilliant analogy I came up with? It's like a gourmet cheesecake and a Twinkie (Josh being the former, Edward the latter). Of course, you're going to love the cheesecake more. It's just better, and if you had your druthers you'd get it every time. Then you have the Twinkie, and you know it's horrible for you and nothing in it actually exists in nature ... still, sugarrrrrr, and you love it even though you know there's something better.

See, now isn't that brilliant?

This is why when I refer to my love for all things Twilight from here on out, the words "Sparkly Twinkie" will probably appear. Twilight is my Sparkly Twinkie.

So let's see, what else ... we just had Christmas! (Yay Christmas!) The holidays felt really rushed to me this year. Plus we had to travel, which I used to love but have now decided I'd rather not do on Christmas Day, thankyouverymuch. When you can't sleep the night before and you get up at 5, you don't want to spend all day in the truck - you want to play with your new toys and take a nap! Still, we had a good day. It's about the only time of year we get to see my mom's brother and his family.

We go back to school next week too ... and that is nothing at all even remotely resembling a sparkly Twinkie. It's more like a Twinkie that's been hiding, unwrapped, under the refrigerator for 6 months. I'm hoping this semester will be better than last, though. I've heard other English majors say that once you get past Literary Criticism, everything else is cake. Here's hoping! Next semester I'm taking Singers (again, because I cannot live without it), English Lit, Descriptive Linguistics (doesn't THAT sound exciting), American Lit, 20th Century America, and CREATIVE WRITING: FICTION!!!! I'm way pumped. I'm hoping that will only serve to enhance my fanfic adventures. :D

Okay, this is way long so I'll stop and try not to do this to you again. When I get going, it's hard to stop, hee.

Until next time!